Life keeps on going no matter what.. right?

I mean you can have the worst day... imaginable. The worst week.
You just.. kinda have to pick yourself up and keep on moving. And
that sucks on it's own, especially when you don't really have anyone
to lean on, or that person you leaned on for years is off on their own
living their own life.. or the person you leaned on is just not there for
you anymore.. he just doesn't care anymore, and you're left feeling
like the whole world is crashing to your feet. It's honestly how I feel.

Obviously I'm not ignorant enough to say: Hey life keeps on going even when you
DIE. Because that's not what I meant, for you incompetents out there..
I meant, you have to keep on going. My problem is I don't want to. I don't get
how I put up with so much for so long and that person doesn't see it, just sees
the flaws and faults I have / have done. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone
makes a few EPIC mistakes.

You know, I wanna turn around and be like - This is YOUR epic mistake.
You will be sorry, in the end.. You will miss me, You will regret leaving me
alone and thinking I'm nothing anymore - because the things I did for you
were unbelievably remarkable, things no sane human would do. (Very few,
anyways..) And.. the crap I had to deal with with family issues and with
moving 800 miles away.. and things I'd rather not speak of.. it all showed
how much I NEEDED him and WANTED him in my life, and how much I was
soooo deeply in love with him. No scratch that - AM in love with him.

The saddest part of all is a 2 1/2 year old beautiful little girl asking daily
why mommy and daddy aren't here, where's daddy. A little angel who
cries and gets terrified everytime I walk out the door because she thinks
mommy is leaving again because she's seen it so many times when I
couldn't handle the BS or other dumb reasons, and she's old enough to
express her fear and opinions about it now. It kills me to see how much
she misses us, misses going to the park with us or going for walks or
being a family. I wish he could see that - honestly. That we were such an
amazing family when there were no B-S interruptions from people hating
on us or hoping wed faith or interjecting their opinions constantly or
going against one of us to play on the other. (I know everyone knows
what I'm talking about because theres always people who are unsupportive
of relationships, and it's not their business it only KILLS the two people
who are trying to get by and survive. It makes them act like monsters
towards eachother.. it makes them lose their identity for soo long...)

So this is a song.. I listen to it in the car, in the house, on walks...
This song is what I listen to when I hit rock bottom. When I need
someone the most and he's not there for me to talk to, or cry to..
I wish he'd hear this song right now.
I wish he would just get it.

*Rev Theory - Broken Bones*
(Lyrics underneath player)

Walking a fine line between wrong and right
And I know...
There is a part of me that I try to hide
But I can't win
And I can't fight
I keep holding on too tight
Running away from the world outside

Now I am calling
Hoping you'll hear me
We all need somebody
To believe in something
And I won't fear this
When I am falling
We all need somebody
That can mend... These broken bones

Caught in the confines of the simple life
And I am...
Holding my head high in the rising tide
And I can't win
And I can't fight
I keep holding on too tight
Running away from the world outside

Now I am calling
Hoping you'll hear me
We all need somebody
To believe in something
And I won't fear this
When I am falling
We all need somebody
That can mend... These broken bones

But Oh
Yeah

I'm not coming home now
I know...
I'm so far away
So far from home
I'm not coming home now
I know...
I'm so far away
I'm so far away

And I can't win
And I can't fight
I keep holding on too tight

Now I am calling
Hoping you'll hear me
We all need somebody
To believe in something
And I won't fear this
When I am falling
We all need somebody
That can mend... These broken bones

And I can't win
And I can't fight
I keep holding on too tight
Running away from the world outside

And I can't win
And I can't fight
I keep holding on too tight
Running away from the world outside