Two Blonde men were in the woods hunting. One looked at the other and said, "I've got to take a shit."

The other said, "Well go behind one of those big trees, and shit."

The first one said, "But I don't have any paper to wipe my ass." The other blonde replied, "You have a dollar, don't you?"

The first one said, "Yeah, I've got a dollar. That's a great idea-- I'll use that!"

He left and came back with shit all over his hands and clothes.

His friend looked at him and asked, "What in the hell happened to you?"

The first one replied, "Have you ever tried to wipe your ass with 3 quarters, 2 dimes, and a nickel?"

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A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.

Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," was the reply.

"I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy.

After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question.

The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29".

"I am actually 47."

Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same question.

She replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age."

As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her slip her hand down his pants.

Ten minutes later, the old lady says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47."

Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?"

The old lady replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."

Thats it folks. Enjoy your Thursday. Ther will be more to come..

Peace.

Posted at 04/29/2010 08:25 AM

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Holy Trolls!

It's been a long ass while since I've logged on.. Hope to log in more often if I can..

I am very disappointed to see how many trolls there are on this site now. How things have changed..

Whatev, to the new comers-YOU ARE ALL NOOBS! Muah ah ah ah! ;)

Too all my long lost friends-I LOVE YOU ALL and MISS YOU MUCH!

I'll be on tonight so if anyone's game for MW2, hit me up!

Peace.

Posted at 04/28/2010 02:16 PM

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Oh Boy...

Well its been a long minute since I've blogged so why not today right?

But I wanted to Thank Ratchison, Kevin, and Phorexia for wishing me a Happy Birthday. I was surprised that anyone even wished me a Happy Birthday since I barely ever log in anymore, but Thanks Guys!

My B-day weekend was alright didn't do much just hung out with the family and friends. I ended up buying b-day presents for myself, had a field day at Victoria's Secret.. And got $100 off which is always nice!

I am so stoked that the New COD comes out tomorrow, can't wait to pick up my copy after work..

Speaking of work, for those that know me, work is getting pretty crazy. I am going to start working overtime.. Ugh..Probably 50-60 hours a week until Jan. 4th. The money is going to be super great but I've not had a day off since June...and I really need to have a couple days off here...and soon.. My plate is getting a little too full, its overwhelming.

Well anyway, Thanks again guys for the wishes.

Peace.

Posted at 11/09/2009 08:09 AM

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WTF?!?!

So I decided to change my gamertag on here to my actual gamertag since I've changed it.. And I fucked it all up and can't access my profile... WTF?!

I can access my intro but after that I can't... Um... Dunno what to do....totally clueless...

Any suggestions kids?

Thanks.

ARCH

Posted at 10/13/2009 05:48 PM

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Long Time No Logs...Or Blogs..

Wow... Has it been a while since I've logged into this account. Dont even know if anyone I used to talk to is on here anymore.. The last time I wrote was before Easter and that feels like forever ago..

Not much has changed, except the weather. Still in the same house, the same town, and the same job..

Didn't log in for quite sometime because this site at that time was starting to be consumed by kids who have absolutely no brain capacity to engage in an intellectual conversation, in which I felt I didn't need to waste my time..

But as time passed I had to hop back on the GTP wagon and see who else was strapped in...

For those that do know me and are reading this I make this announcement for the very first time.. to you.. aren't you lucky!

I am Awesome.. ahahahhaha sorry... but guess whose back?

Cursed...

Posted at 08/29/2009 10:18 PM

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Eye of the Storm

Do you panic buy if you hear about any bad weather coming?

No I dont actually. I just watch the weather channel like a mad woman. I've been in several hurricanes and drove through one. During hurricane Charlie, I was visiting my grandparents during the summer for a few months, and we did go stock up on supplies and the essentials but nothing crazy. But here in Chicago, we've never really had any serious weather so there is no need to stock up. The worst we get is bad snow storms and blizzard type stuff, but you can usually get out after a few hours.. Plus I pretty much keep the kitchen stocked with stuff anyway..

But with thunderstorms and such Im like bring it on, I love thunderstorms. Nothing like a free lightshow from nature, its beautiful..

Well one more day till Easter, Im kindof a kid at heart...Ok I am.. So when I was a kid I loved Easter and all the pretty eggs and well.. It sucks that I can't go out tomorrow and search for easter eggs and a candy filled easter basket.. But eh I think I'll manage.. lol..

I did however color easter eggs yesterday at a co workers house with her kids. It was fun.

Well not much is going on tonight...There are 2 parties going on and I am not sure which one to attend...Probably the one that is closer to the house. But who knows my mind could change later..like it normally does.

Well anywho you all have a nice saturday evening...And I will be on later today for a lil bit so if your on and you have my current tag name, lets get together and rock out on some games maybe..It has been a minute since I've played with some of you kids..

Well Keep it real GTP'ers.

Cheers

Posted at 04/11/2009 12:20 PM

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All in the Family

Talk about your family; bros, sis, first home...

Well I have an older sister, she is 16 months older, and I have a younger brother, he is 2 years younger. My parents got divorced when I was in 3rd grade, 4 years later my father remarried, so that brought in another older sister and a younger brother into the family on my dads side. I consider them to be bro and sis since they have been in the family-my dads side- for a while now. They are good people too so that is always a nice thing. Lynn is my step mom and she is pretty cool. My dad lives about a half hour away from me, same with my grandparents and my little biological bro. My sister lives in Phoenix with her husband and her 14 month old son, also my god-son! My mom lives in Florida, she moved there about 2 years ago.

The very first house was on Chicago Street, a beautiful home, with cherry trees in the back yard. We moved out of that house before I was in kindergarden, after that house we moved into a house that was double the size in a really nice neighbor hood, with a huge pool in the back yard.. Lived there for several years until my parents got divorced. Then my mom, sis, bro, and I moved into a 2 bedroom condo which was very small. My dad was the bread winner in the family-he makes a whole lot of money. That was really hard to do, 2 bedrooms us 3 kids and my mom, the sleeping was like magical chairs except with a queen size bed and a couch. So my mom got full custody of us and we visited our father everyother weekend. After living in that house for about 2 years we moved again to another house that, oddly enough, was the house that my mother grew up in. Lived there from 5th grade to the middle of my senior year, after that I've been on my own. Moved about 10 times in my life time with more places to add to that list in the future Im sure and hopefully a different state too..

I'd post pictures of the fam in the blog but I have some posted on my profile, if your curious go check em' out.

In June my sister and nephew are coming out for vacation, on my dads side we do a family vacation all the way up north in Wisconsin every year, we've done this for the past 12 years, my dad has a cabin up there, its like a hotel it has 6 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, its really nice. In the middle of nowhere. I can't wait to see her and my nephew, I've not seen them both since last march. Its been so long since I've seen my nephew he was only 3 months old the last time I saw him, now he is 14 months old. Hes walkin and talkin now... so crazy. Its going to be so much fun!!

Well I hope that everyone has a wonderful evening and a great saturday! Oh and a Happy Easter too!!

Much Love kids!

Cheers!

Posted at 04/10/2009 09:26 PM

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Wheeow..Its been a minute!

Have I ever done fasting? Yes I have, only for a 24 hour period and I wont do it again. I love food too much to not eat it. Plus it doesnt help that I love to cook too.

Now onto better news, I am back people its been about a month but I will be checkin GTP a whole lot more often. Bought myself a pretty lil laptop!! And she is a beauty!

I miss all of you; Bucky, Kevin, Phantom, Spartan, Miss Cheeky Hoops (Danii), Cookie, Angel, Snake Eyes, Elf, Davy, Anfone, Yoshi, Cage, and everyone else. I would name all of you but that would take a while to do. But I hope that all of you are doing well, I miss talking to you guys-You all were my bowl full of sanity! LOL! Not much has been up my way except work has been real busy but thankfully I have a 3 day weekend so that is nice, I surely need the time off!

I ended up having a root canal this week, ouch! And they didn't even perscribe me with pain killers...assholes! And they also decided to give me an antibiotic that had a small percentage of penicillin in it.. And if you don't know Im deathly allergic to penicillin. After taking the stuff for 2 days I started to feel really weird, chest pains, it started to get hard to breath, and I almost fainted this morning. So I called the pharmasist and found out that it had penicillin in it. Funny thing is I even told the dentist my allergies.. Idiot! Thankfully I stopped taking it before it was too late. Whew! So now I am feeling a lot better.

well dont know what else to say so I'll leave you with a small joke

Why do leprachans laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls!

Much Love kids!

Cheers

Posted at 04/09/2009 08:48 PM

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Here I am..Look at Me Here I go!

Do you/Have you/Would you play Xbox while naked?

Ok well if you know me then you should know that I can't pass up answering a question like that! Unfortunately.. (haha good word usage there! yay me! LOL) No I've not played the xbox while naked But! I would if I was that cracked out for it once I got out of the shower and really wanted to play or something. If I had a webcam and I was single why the hell not right?

Well anyways I wanted to let you all in on what has been going on with me since I last wrote..since I've not been on in a while I'll let y'all know whats going on my way! Not much really except for I am one short of a finger nail, I was wrestling with the boytoy and my finger got caught on his belt and ripped the damn thing off. Hurt like a SOB! the nail was still attached at the cuticle or the base of the nail so I went to the doc the next day to see what I should do since I've never ripped any of my prescious nails off.. So the doc gave me a shot of novocaine in the finger with the largest needle I've ever seen in my life, then she lifted the nail up and put some glue-gel stuff and wrapped it. Pretty gross actually. Now I just have to wait and see if my nail will grow back, if it doesn't Im going to cut one of my bf's toes off so he too will be one short of a nail..haha! Of course his will be more extreme than mine! Muah ah ah ah ah! Im just kidding..

Other than that I've also been shopping for a laptop...Any suggestions? I'm looking for one that is capable for gaming. I found one that had a Gears of War theme and it was this metallic grey and orange it was pretty cooooolll..For $1200... Im thinkin that might be the winner! Not sure still deciding..

well I best get going my time is up but I miss you all and hope to talk to you soon!!

Thanks to everyone for the nice comments and sorry to those I didn't mention but you all know that I love you and miss you! If your missin me and feel like your going to cry b/c you miss me so much, just send me a message on XBL and I'll sing you a song! ;)

Love You!

Cheer Kids!

Posted at 03/10/2009 06:56 AM

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Im still Alive Everyone!!

whats in the headline new today?!

Well for one its me!! To everyone that I dearly know and care about on this site this blogs for you. I've not been able to log on for quite sometime as you all noticed. I am usually on this site at work only and since they've changed the internet proxy settings I am no longer able to view this site while at work.

I will keep this account on here active and if you want you may leave me messages but I will not look or read them every day. I will check this account as much as I can, with that being said please know that once a month is probably the best that I can do..I would check it when at home but since I look at a computer like 8 hours, I dont want to see a computer screen once I get home.

I hope that everyone is doing well and I miss you all lots!!

As you know I've changed my GT to DTS ARCH ANGEL, if you want to say hi or whatever go ahead and message me on xbl.

Since I've not been on here I'll tell you that I miss reading Kevin's, Davy's, and Buckys blogs, I miss chating it up with Miss Danii, Cookie, Progress, well Im not going to list them all but you know who you are.

So I better get going I dont have much time, but I miss you all and Im sending Love your way.

Cheers Everyone

Cursed.

Posted at 03/04/2009 06:57 AM

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